Transitions

My first mission president had a list of 10 things to help missionaries adjust being in the field. One of the 10 things was "expect an adjustment period" and within that adjustment comes phases. There's the something something phase...and the other phase....(both of which I can't remember haha something to do with shock, and then reality) and then comes the "like-it phase" and the "love-it phase." I really LIKE Mexico. I really LIKE my family that I live with and the kids at the school and the culture and all of that, but I don't LOVE it yet. I want to. I want to be in the love-it phase. I don't like doing things half-way, and that's what I realized I was doing at school today. I'm there physically and mentally, but emotionally I'm not. But the problem is I can't figure out where my heart is...if it's in Utah or in California. I am sad about the things I am missing out on this summer in Utah: Nathan's graduation tomorrow, Laura's wedding, our family reunion, Geneil's recital, teaching mission prep, working with the missionaries, birthday's, BBQ's, camping and boating trips, snow cones, hiking, laughing with friends, eating frozen yogurt and sitting there and talking for hours on end, going to girl's camp to help for a day, our awesome Disneyland road trip, all the things I didn't get to do for so long because I was a missionary....

But as much as I am missing all of those things in Utah I think I am still missing walking the blazing hot streets in the desert of California. Talking to people, loving them, serving them, getting rejected by them, stared at by them, and sometimes even getting yelled at. I miss the members and the families I taught. I even miss nightly planning! I loved knowing what I was going to do of every hour of everyday. Now I get letters every week from my companions that are still in the mission field.  I am so filled with joy because I can feel their joy through their words and the light in their eyes from the pictures they send...but at the same time, there is a sadness that comes with it...that I'm not the one there. They're not "my family's" or "my investigators" anymore.

I don't really know where I am going with that other than, I'm ready to LOVE Mexico. I'm ready to put my heart into my lessons and into teaching and being involved with the lives of everyone here.

 It's raining right now. My window is open and the fan is on and 'se siente rico el aire!' I feel like my Spanish has taken a little jump of improvement in the last couple days and that makes me excited. I feel driven to complete the goals that I have set for the summer. I'm behind on a few of them, but I'm going to keep working. I want to use this time wisely and become a better person because of the things I will experience and learn this summer in Mexico. I have never had so much time to just sit and ponder and read and study and write. I have had some great plans come to mind for the future and things that I can do to improve here and now. I am grateful that Heavenly Father is aware of us and that he knows where we are at all times, whether that be physically, mentally, emotionally, or spiritually. He's so good. :)

Bienvenidos a Tehuacán

I love where I live!

And even more-I love with whom I live!!! Marylee, and her daughter Karla and then Karyme (the niece/cousin) lives down the street a few houses. I love them!

looking out onto the street from our front door.

 I love this little lady. We went to one of the little tiendas (stores) to get some avocados for lunch and this Senora was cutting up nopales (catcus). I asked her if I could take a picture of her and she seemed pretty excited about that.

We also bought these strange fruit thingys. they're really rough around the outside, but they have a pretty soft shell so once you tear it open it kind of tastes like a grape...kind of, the texture is really similar though, and then I has a weird seed in the middle. I like 'em.

I love that everything is so brightly colored everywhere you go!!! This is a street where we were waiting for a Kombi the other night. (They're kind of like little buses..like VW buses...stuffed with lots of people...and it kind of feels like Indiana Jones at Disneyland...only A LOT cheaper. :) ) 

I love my little friend Karyme. She took me to the playground behind our house the other day. She's so smart and ALWAYS has something to say. She's so kind and is the biggest help around the house!!! 

and of course, the family dog, Milo. (I'm just happy he's not a Chihuahua...not that I don't like Chihuahuas......I just met WAY too many of them in California...and now when I see them, I have strange twitches that go through my body...as if I'm about to drop-kick them or something like that...I don't know.) 

                                                  you know, just the usual, playin' futbol.

 You know what I've done since I've gotten here? Eaten tacos. and tacos. and more tacos. :) and I couldn't be happier. :) (and I thought I was going to lose 5 pounds here. ha. joke's on me.) These are my new friends and I love them! From left to right, Sandy, Jessica, Karen, me, and Karla.

I am sending out a weekly e-mail as well with more detailed stories and such. If you would like to be on the e-mail list just post your e-mail below in the comments and I'll add you on. 

Welcome to Help!

The name of the school where I teach is Heslington, but Help is the name of the company? I actually don't know how that all works. Teo and his wife, Rachel own/run the school and they're both very nice. Teo is the stake president of the Teheuacan stake. There's 4 wards here in Teheuacan and then another ward and branch out in the pueblitos!

This is the school! There's two different parts to it-The ILP part (we teach the young young kids that are just starting to learn English) and then the Help part (and they teach the advanced kids and adults-they're on the top two levels)

Sunset looking out from the 3 level of the school

Sweet little Milka came running over to me the other day before class started and pointed excitedly to my pants! We both had green pants and a black shirt on! Twinners!

We played a board game in class the other day. We basically teach 8, 25 minute classes everyday. There are two main classes in the afternoon and into the evening. We divide the kids up for the rotations. They have way more energy than I do, that is for sure!

All the teachers were excited that it was Friday today, so we were trying to get the kids to point to the Friday sign...I don't know if they were quite as excited as we were.

These cute girls are in a little more advanced class and they're really fun because they can communicate really well. this program is really great and the kids learn quick!

I did a relay race with my kids today in class. I think that they had fun.

These boys are too cute, I can't even handle them. Oh my, when those kids look up and you and say "Teacher, can I drink water?" What are you supposed to say? No?! I don't think so, it's way too hard. They're just too darn cute and I love them all so much already!

I am sending out a weekly e-mail as well with more detailed stories and such. If you would like to be on the e-mail list just post your e-mail below in the comments and I'll add you on.

..but my heart is still there

I don't feel as though I can just go on with my life without posting a little something about where I have been for the last 18 months of my life. My Mission. The greatest thing that has happened for me. It is absolutely impossible to describe in words what it means to me and what it has done for me. To put into words what the people mean to me in the California Riverside and Redlands Missions would be...significantly below what I feel in my heart. But know, know that I love them with all my heart. I love my mission.

But most importantly my love for the gospel grew and continues to grow. I wish that everyone could take a moment and sincerely open their hearts to HEAR and seek to UNDERSTAND the significance of the message of the RESTORATION of THE GOSPEL OF JESUS CHRIST. The message that I had the opportunity to share as an authorized servant of Jesus Christ changed the world, and continues to changes lives heart by heart, and family by family. I know that Jesus Christ is our perfect exemplar, our friend and our personal Savior. I don't understand everything but I feel in my heart that it is true. It is the same feeling I have when I hear the humble story of the boy Joseph Smith and when I read The Book of Mormon, the proof of what said happened, really did happen.

I invite all my friends and brothers and sisters that if you have not picked up The Book of Mormon and read, PLEASE do it! If you have any question in this life it can be answered through the teachings of the Savior in The Book of Mormon. Time in this life is short, the WORK is HASTENING and we can't procrastinate any longer. After you have read, PRAY. Pray as Moroni teaches,"...with real intent, and a sincere heart, having FAITH in JESUS CHRIST..." (Moroni 10:3-5). I know you will come to feel in your heart and mind that these things are true! And if we have read and understood, (or even have read and have not yet understood) and are not doing everything we can to COME UNTO CHRIST we too must repent. I just can't even imagine what the next life will be without all these dear people whom and I loved, and talked to, and prayed and studied for...but I also feel deep in my heart that if we don't help each other ENDURE TO THE END then we will be held, in part, for not sharing these things. But I testify that "there is not greater joy in life than being anxiously engaged in the work of the Lord." -Elder M. Russell Ballard I know that is true because I experience that for 18 months of my life. I have seen glimpses of that feeling in my life since coming home, but I want to continue to strive to be anxiously engaged no matter where or what I am doing in my life.  

Yes, getting baptized is just that good and exciting. :)

Wow, I did not even plan on going off like that, but I guess that's what is truly in my heart. My heart is still in California. I am trying my best to move forward with a brightness of hope and good and even great things are happening. I have so many things in my life I need to do to repent, change and better, but I am grateful for the daily opportunity I have to try again. I love the gospel of Jesus Christ! I love missionary work! And I love God's children! (It has taken all the strength in me to not bawl while writing and posting these pictures. It tears out my heart that I am not there. I tell every missionary I see that I would trade them spots in an instance and they look at me like I'm crazy. I'm not. Being a missionary is just that good. :) )